Day 9 of my Progressively More Restrictive Diet

This week is gonna be a lot harder than I thought I did not stick to my diet at all diet. I could have, but gave into every craving I had. Sometimes, I'm convinced I don't have an ED at all. It doesn't matter what the docs and social workers say. I eat like I don't. I take laxatives and purge like I have bulimia. I attempt to restrict and sometimes, successfully restrict like I have Ana. I dunno. Right now, I feel like this disorder's not a reality in my life. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Its hard because I didn't have school and felt directionless all day. Tomorrow, I have plans and will follow through with my plan. I am gonna switch out the ensure for a goat yogurt. I bought one today at this little local shop and I'm super excited about it. But I still plan to have the smoothie in the evening. And lots of tea! I can do this; I know I can. I got below 90 and I'm down to 85. I can get below 80!